24Oct2012 1930: Buckle Spring

This post is the first written by my new keyboard, same as the old keyboard. Unicomp not only secured some prime Internet real estate at "pckeyboard.com", they also own all the licenses and tooling machinery to reproduce the greatest keyboard of all time. Replacing the war-torn Model M by my couch could only be done by another Model M. My only regret is that I went with the Space Saver model instead of the fully tank-like Classic.

Followup: you should go see Peelander Z. The processed produced sound on their albums fail to capture the ear-ringing power of seeing these aliens scream on stage in front of a jumping crowd. You should drive seven hours to see them. You should walk from the year 1975 to see them. GO NOW.

I have been known to like music of some vintage. [Beats Antique - Skeleton Key] takes that same idea, the revival of music once heard only over radios as large as a fourth-grader, and throws in some dubstep. This is Kronos Quartet playing a skeevy underground rave. Basically I'm saying this is ear cancer.

[The Gaslamp Killer feat. Miguel Atwood-Ferguson - Flange Face] had me praying for ear cancer, that this cup might pass me by. Yet another instrumental, this time a noisy industrial experiment.

[Ruby Velle and the Soulphonics - My Dear] is yet another band that, but for Adele and Winehouse, would be languishing in a local jazz club for their year-long career. But becuase the music industry accidentally stumbled into a form of pop that adults want to listen to, Ruby Velle gets to have some promotional consideration. That sounds incredibly dismissive for one of the best freebies this month, but as good as this is do I really need to follow another band in the same genre?

17Oct2012 1115: Pedlander Zed

Should I go see Peelander Z on Saturday? I should probably go see Peelander Z on Saturday. You should probably go see Peelander Z on Saturday. Be it resolved! PLZ and then some White Castle just down the street. Wait. No, that link was about tacos. Maybe this one? Shit. Do they really not have a song about burgers? They don't have a song about burgers...yet.

Every single one of their videos has a bunch of comments about "dude you have to see them live holy shit" so I feel confident in my decision. And even if it sucks it's an opportunity to break in the nameless one on a road trip. And hey: White Castle!

[The Fresh & Onlys - Presence of Mind] must have a pretty good agent, with simultaneous free placement both at Google and Amazon. They certainly need one, as this downbeat indie rock doesn't stand out from any of the other downbeat indie rock that I've gathered over the years. And then they fade out at the end?! I started hating on fade-outs because of Guitar Hero, and this song is so mellow to begin with...where do you plan to fade out to?

[Ondatropica - Gaita Tropica]. Instrumental Latin jazz. Oh joy.

[The Chevin - Blue Eyes] becomes the fourth song titled "Blue Eyes" (Cary Brothers, Destroyer, Ladyhawke) on my nascent "These Aren't Covers" playlist, putting "Blue Eyes" in the lead. This is shaping up to be a pretty great playlist, by the way. Three "Automatic"s, three "Far Away"s, two "Eve of Destruction"s that are almost a cover but really just copy the chorus...good stuff. If I listened to Katy Perry she would definitely run away with the not-cover award; as far as I can tell she's built her career on the titles of other people's hit singles. Anyway: The Chevin gets to stay even though the song itself is pretty bland rock that starts with some terrible lyricliches. My word, I just made it.

10Oct2012 1830: A Technological Noose

My yet-unnamed ride is already proving its worth. Yesterday morning I walked out the door, got into the car, put it into reverse, and then car informed me "Hey, Bob, you know that Bluetooth device I've been playing music from? I can't find it." Well shit, car, you're right. I did leave my phone up on the charger. I'm not a big fan of what I consider the bumpy ride, but I also realize that I'm comparing it to the leather-clad cloud that is a Town Car. The rest of the car seems good to me, and so far the promises of doubled gas mileage hold up.

On the more sinister end of technology, I also took receipt of my box set for The Mysterious Cities of Gold. Hoping to stir up some nostalgia among the siblings, I snapped a photo with my phone. This photo:

Not fifteen seconds later, before I had even managed to upload the photo, my phone beeped at me. Google had recognized the product in the photo and sent me a notification about "hey, do you want to buy The Mysterious Cities of Gold at any of these fine stores?". Three things.

1. This is fucking terrifying.
2. Wait...it recognized the product but didn't tag my face? It ran the DVD box set cover through some algorithm to match it with a product, but didn't notice my face?
3. Come to think of it, it didn't realize a human was holding this product at all. If there's a picture of a human holding a product, I think you can assume that the human is already in possession of that product. Why are you advertising that same product?

I think the usual use case here is people taking pictures of things in stores and Google juicing up its Amazon kickbacks. Open letter to Google when their robots index this post: you should add an exception for people clearly holding the product in frame. In fact, your phone purports to have location tracking; maybe make an exception if I'm clearly not in a store.

What I'm saying is that I'm not sure if a balm to my fear requires more data snooping or less data snooping.

Quick shout-out to my webhosts, Nearly Free Speech. The UK's bullshit libel laws are gunning for them, and thus, indirectly, me. Haha I bet you thought I couldn't make this paragraph about me but you were wrong.

Today in Monty's Behind the Curve: I'm already a week behind on terrible reviews of terrible music. Let's get this party started with a lot of Js. [Jillette Johnson - Torpedo] is a slow pop jam involving some sort of torpedo metaphor. And it's not equating a torpedo with a penis. It's reaching and straining for some incomprehensible kind of message but its slavish attention to pop formula causes me to gag.

[JT Hodges - Leaving Me Later] is a Sad Country Song wherein some spineless rube waits for the other shoe to drop on his unhealthy relationship. Brotip: ladies do not dig this attitude.

I don't like MF DOOM, at all, in any of his projects. I just don't like his voice. [JJ DOOM; MF DOOM - Guv'nor] is him rapping about Britain and drugs, two topics that do not interest me.

05Oct2012 2000: HMS Goliath 2005-2012

Where have I been all week? I've been running around finding a replacement for the HMS Goliath, now in its seventeenth and final year of active service. August saw an expensive tire-rod repair; two weeks ago was a power steering pump. While the mechanics were under there replacing that pump, they noticed that the water pump was looking weak. That was the final straw.

I'll skip all the research and agonizing and get to the point:

A bog-standard Honda Accord, and it's going to be great. Double my old gas mileage, it knows what mp3 players are, and it's under warranty for a while. In one afternoon of driving the count stands at five attempts to shift gears on the steering column and three attempts to rest my arm across the bench seat. Fortunately it was actually snow/raining, so my windshield wipers didn't draw attention.