25Mar2009 1900: Flood

Every stereotype you've heard about Fargo is true. Citizens band together to sandbag the entire city against a legendary flood while 8 more inches of snow fall in late March. You should all move here!

[Utada Hikaru - Come Back to Me] is this week's video, and it reminds me I should probably down-rate the other Utada songs I have. They were okay for the novelty of how music-industry pop sounded the same the world over, but now...they're just pop. This song is slow diva R&B pining for an ex-boyfriend and staunching the loss with shopping. My mind shut down after that verse.

[Ines Gaviria - Como Tu] brings some more of the ubiquitous autotuned pop sound, but at least she sounds like she's having fun with it.

When [The Juan MacLean - One Day] came up with its robotic bassline I pumped my fist in the air. Are we sure this isn't Metronomy under an alias? Maybe a side band where the women take center stage over the dudes? Because it sounds like that kind of song again. Eletronic everything, a minimalist new wave tune that will hover around four stars for the rest of its days.

[Jay Rock - All My Life In the Ghetto] has a backing of some sort of soul/disco, and that is its only redeeming feature.

23Mar2009 1700: Psyphy

I've spent less than a day with it, but I would recommend my new watch to anybody. It's so shiny! It ticks! I have given my life to computer programming, to the science and art of directing microscopic rivers of man-forged sand to rearrange their electron structure to serve my will; but as I do, I am acutely aware of the need for a mechanical, manual backup. That is what this watch represents. In an era before Hitler and cliche, it was pocketwatches that kept the trains running on time. Medieval technology that incorporates a minimum of 17 rubies, not for their aesthetic value but for their Mohs value. It is a wonder of engineering that any sap could simulate with a few system calls, but which very few could machine out of steel. It gave us the impetus for Dr Manhattan and the only Heroes character we can still respect.

I doubt it will survive a year in my aggressive, erosive pockets.

I am about to catch up on Friday's scifi and I am afraid. I'm afraid I won't have enough alcohol in the room for what Galactica will pull out of its ass.

18Mar2009 1930: Siefie

Is anybody really surprised by SciFi's ill-advised rebranding? Really? Have you been watching this channel for the past few years, like I have? Have you noticed them signing up progressively more ridiculous content, from Ghost Hunters to ECW to that new Ultimate Gamer Bullshit? Bonnie Hammer's legacy lives on in their latest inexplicable move. I'm switching cable companies on Monday and ditching the TV programming, and I will miss the NFL more than SciFi. Galactica is leaving and so am I.

My cable move is forced upon me by the imminent demise of my DSL service. Qwest itself isn't folding, but my ISP's hardware is dying the slow death of all electronics. Any other ISP is going to jack my price up to where it's more profitable to switch back over to cable internet. It's actually a miracle I've had access for two nights in a row, I didn't think I'd be able to post this tonight.

I'm retiring my venerable pocketwatch/bottle-opener very soon, in favor of something yet more awesome. I spent far too much time looking for something with a skeleton case plus black hands...I hope the $35 price doesn't mean it's made of plastic.

The Xbox crew is meeting up in the Cities this weekend and I'm stoked for Rock Band.

[Arthur Hanlon & Luis Fonsi - Te Quiero Llevar] is some soft-rocking piano in the vein of Billy Joel. Now, nothing against Billy Joel, but I can see this song featuring heavily in the opening credits for a show on whatever the Spanish equivalent of the Lifetime network is. Google Translate tells me it's "Vida". So imagine the worst show you've ever seen on Vida.

As I was typing the first paragraph about Syfy, [Calle 13 - Electro Movimiento] -- this week's video -- started playing in the background. My typing slowed, and I thought to myself, "Spanish rap? Hm, but it sounds like 80s rap. Who does this?" And I brought iTunes to the fore just in time for the first refrain. And then I stared, transfixed, as the 80s exploded in my face. Holy shit. Cupcakes and ninjas! Je ne parle pas l'Spanish, but I know when a dude is telling everybody to do the fucking Robot!

[Eli Young Band - When It Rains] twangs its way into my heart recycle bin. Plus, who the hell is man enough to follow Electro Movimiento?

[Gloriana - Wild at Heart] gives us a double-dose of country, but doesn't have anything to recommend it. No self-deprecating humor, no Merle Haggard, no whiskey. What's the point?

10Mar2009 2030: Stay Awhile and Listen

No. No! NOOOOO!! You and I both know how this goes, I'll disappear into clickclickclick for a week or two and never get close to touching all the new content you'll insert at the end. Damn you, Blizzard, where does all this development come from? You've already got Starcraft 2 and Diablo 3 competing for my neurons, you've got that World of Whatever that needs expansions, and now you're putting out another patch for Diablo 2? Do your employees just dick around with this on their lunch break? "Hey Steve, remember that game we made like ten years ago and scored us all that cash? Check it out I made a new sword that only drops once ever."

I hate you I love you I hate you I love you.

Posting tonight, as tomorrow will be taken up with a software release. We were going to do it tonight but this morning got ugly. I've never heard of NDSU cancelling day classes for anything, but today was apparently that breaking point. The snow day was excellent but something seems to be acting up with my router. I've had crap for bandwidth most of the day. It's not like electrons get cold...

[The Tossers - Siobhan] have arrived at the perfect time. Their Celtic smashmouth lookatmeIm'sotough follows close on the heels of Magnatune's update of bawdy ren-faire tunes that I bought immediately.

[The Answer - Demon Eyes] is living their dream of rocking a Detroit arena full of big-haired 80s beauties. No. Wait. That's a little wrong. What drugs do you have to take to think it's still acceptable to rock in this fashion?

[Shawn Smith - Losing Home] is a little rock-rap number that sounds like all the best of the 90s, and then also rap. It's like the guy from Soul Coughing decided to take a little time off and write some phat rhymez. And no don't email me if it actually IS the singer from Soul Coughing because I'm not looking it up and I don't care.

[Makano - Traicion] is a pretty curious item. It doesn't sound like the other Latin music that iTunes has tricked me into. This is more... reggae? Spanish reggae? So I hate it twice.

4Mar2009 2000: The Firewall

The Watchmen cometh. Are you ready? I'm ready. I've got my midnight showing tickets reserved online and Friday blocked off on my work calendar. The reviews, despite steadily dropping from 85% to the high sixties this week, seem to be divided into "We love Watchmen" and "It's so faithful to the book that it's boring"...both of which sound like positives to me.

Pandora does a pretty good job of playing things I like to hear, so much so that I haven't missed my iPod for a couple weeks. The work firewall is coming back soon so I'll probably lose access. It's just as well; I'm impressed by the breadth of music they have (Puppini Sisters, Operation Ivy, and MC Chris all represented), but I'm losing patience with the depth. They know who the Puppini Sisters are, but they only seem to play Bei Mir Bist Du Schoen...and I'm now sick of that song. Same with [MC Chris - Reese's]. There are always plenty of new songs from the bands they've linked in themselves, but when it hits artists I've specifically typed in there seems to be some availability problems, or maybe a track-selection bias towards certain items. In any case, it may be time to invest in a Touch.

Oops, yup, there's the firewall again. As of 1554 this afternoon, Pandora is gone from my office. So I went straight to Best Buy and picked up a Touch, which is now patiently waiting for me to copy my music over to the laptop. You would think it makes more sense to just use my tower as a media server, but I hardly ever have the big guy on these days. I need want my music with me in the bathroom wherever I go.

A hamster ball controls a robot. Hmmm, where have I seen this before?

Left 4 Dead? Totally worth it. Every night.

[Carolina Liar - Show Me What I'm Looking For] set off country alarms with that band name, but it turns out they're piano pop like... well...like who is popular these days? Ben Folds? Do people still listen to Ben Folds? But this song seems to be praising Jesus so I have to perpetuate the culture-war stereotype and delete it.

[Yomo - Tu Te Las Trae] is a fairly interesting Spanish rap. The music brings to mind every B-movie depicting an urban area from the 90s. Can't say I dislike the use of "aaaiiieeeeee!" in the refrain OH MAN I just got the part with the robot voice. I'm picturing the Latin Kings spontaneously busting out into a choreographed robot danceoff in the street, and now this song gets to stay.

[Powderfinger - Love Your Way] just wants to rock in a totally mellow way. I don't know that I like the general idea of rock ballads, and I already have a collection that have way more of a history with me, so Powderfinger can go love your way somewhere else. Not to mention that I got all excited for a moment, thinking I was downloading something NSFW like this.

[Evidence - For Whom the Bell Tolls] is the video this week, and is a much less compelling rap song than Yomo. Aside from the subject matter (dying on the street (not in a Fargo-freezes-you kind of way)), the rhyme scheme here just got on my nerves. And it's a plodding tempo that lingers on every irritating interior rhyme.